Monday, September 28, 2009

Love and Respect in Relationships

Well, I don't think folks liked my previous blog post very much.

That question was actually posed to a random sample of 400 men. Eighty-two percent of those surveyed said they would rather be alone and unloved in the world than disrespected. I thought that was really interesting.

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, author of Love and Respect and Cracking the Communication Code has spent a lot of time looking at the issue of love and respect in men and women.

Bottomline - women want to be loved and men want to be treated with respect. You may be saying....and..... your point? Well, because men and women see things so differently, when conflict enters into a relationship things can get really tricky.

Generally speaking, when a woman feels unloved she responds with disrespect and when a guy feels disrespected he usually acts in ways that are unloving. The conversation goes something like... (Guy)"I'll love you when you treat me with respect." (Girl) "I'll treat you with respect when you love me."

Based on lots of experience with couples across the country, Eggerichs knows that this back and forth between spouses often leads to what he refers to as "the crazy cycle."

For example: A woman tells her husband she feels fat and needs to go on a diet. He happens to be at a bookstore picking up a newspaper when he sees a best-selling diet book. He buys it thinking he is helping his wife to accomplish her goal to lose weight. When he gives the book to her, she goes ballistic accusing him of being insensitive and they jump on the crazy cycle.

Truth be told, if her best girlfriend had purchased that book for her and suggested that they work the plan together, the response would have been completely different.

Dr. Eggerichs and his wife Sarah are coming to Chattanooga on October 9 and 10th to present the Love and Respect conference.

They will talk about why two good-willed people negatively react to each other; how two people can positively motivate each other by doing one simple thing and the rewards of a Godly marriage and what a person can do if personal expectations are unmet by a spouse.

For more information about the conference click here.

I am curious to know what you think about the whole love and respect concept.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Love or Respect?

Would you rather be left alone and unloved in the world or viewed as inadequate and disrespected by everyone?

Friday, September 25, 2009

Truth about Marriage and Family

Last night First Things First had its largest fundraiser of the year. It was amazing. Michael O'Brien played for a sold out crowd! He was AWESOME. You can hear him at

We showed this video and people LOVED it! Soooo, I thought I would share it with you. Out of the mouths of babes comes real truth about marriage.

A Fresh Look at Marriage

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Can you Say D-I-S-R-E-S-P-E-C-T?

Absolutely unbelievable were the words coming out of my mouth as I watched Serena throw a temper tantrum on the court.

I did not hear the President's speech on healthcare, but I was quite shocked when I heard a Senator yelled out in the middle of it.

Then to top it all off Kanye West jumps up on stage and takes the microphone away from Taylor Swift to tell everybody that Beyonce really had the best female video.

I have had to ask myself, "What is this world coming to?" What happened to manners and respect even when you don't agree?????

If I had done any of these things....even in my adult years, my mother would have had my head.

My husband and I have spent a lot of time and energy teaching our daughter to be respectful even when someone does not deserve it or you don't like what they are saying.

Living in a civil society means that "Anything does NOT go." There are certain things you just don't do.

I hope there were a lot of dinner table conversations with kids about these three examples of inappropriate behavior. Otherwise, we have a lot of young people who are going to assume that anything goes.......

Your thoughts?